Unlike Mark Evanier, I never met Marcia Strassman, who portrayed Julie Kotter, the wife of Gabe Kaplan’s character on Welcome Back, Kotter. Strangely, though, I felt as if I had, because I wrote two issues of the DC Comics series based on that TV show, and so got paid to put words into the mouth of an actress who never actually got to speak them.

As I’ve mentioned here before, I believe I was given the chance to script that comic because I was a Sweathog. (Don’t believe me? Just listen to what I sounded like back then.) Which meant that I had far more in common with guys from Brooklyn than those who would marry them after they grew up. (Or, to put it more accurately, after they didn’t grow up.) But still, I did my best to channel the character she embodied.

In my first issue, that consisted primarily of her reacting to the antics of those around her …

… which while accurate to the show, was also what, according to Evanier, had her dissatisfied with it. (more…)

Remember the Sansaire immersion circulator I bought earlier this year, which I used to prepare the best steak I ever cooked? I loved all the food it helped me sous vide, but there was one relevant issue which prevented 100% satisfaction.

Food cooked via that method ends up pale and unappetizing on the outside, and requires searing to develop a nice crust. I was using a hot pan to achieve this, but in addition to that being messy, not all food is flat, so it’s difficult to reach all the nooks and crannies of a chuck roast, for example.

Something more was needed. That something is my new toy, the Searzall.

The Searzall, which I’d backed on Kickstarter, is a cone that attaches to a blow torch head, basically turning it into a radiant broiler, achieving much higher temperatures than can be reached in a home oven broiler. Additionally, the Searzall is meant to protect the meat from what’s known as “torch taste” which can sometimes occur with an open torch flame. For both of those reasons, I signed on for a Searzall as soon as I heard of it. (more…)

It’s been two weeks since Capclave, which means I’m violating Edelman’s First Rule of Convention Reporting by waiting this long to tell you about my experience. You remember the rule, don’t you? It’s that all convention reporting has to take place while a con is still happening, not merely after the fact, because it’s not enough that I be having a wonderful time—you’ve got to know that I’m having a wonderful time and be grumbling because you’re not with me having a wonderful time, too.

But bandwidth around here being what it is, I had to wait until the following weekend while I was traveling to upload my Capclave videos, and then we had friends visiting this week who only just left, which means it’s a rule that in this instance had to be broken.

Anyway, here’s what the weekend of October 10th through the 12th was like for me …

On Friday, my first panel was at 4:00 p.m.—”The League of Substitute Heroes and the Inferior Five”—during which we were to talk about the B- and C-level superheroes we loved, and I arrived about a half an hour before it was to begin. The ones I reminisced about the most were The Prankster, a one-shot back-up feature from Charlton with overtones of Harlan Ellison’s “”Repent, Harlequin!” Said the Ticktockman,” and Brother Power the Geek, about a mannequin brought to life and given superpowers after being struck by lighting, who then lives among hippies. But I also talked up Matter-Eater Lad as well, a hero after my gastronomic heart.

My next panel wasn’t to be until 9:00 p.m.—”Ending Stories – Bang or Whimper?”—and you’d think that would leave me enough time for dinner. But instead, dinner didn’t leave me enough time for my panel! I went with friends to a nearby restaurant where the service was so slow that a meal which should have taken less than two hours took more than three. And since I was a passenger for this outing, rather than a driver, it meant I didn’t arrive back at Capclave until 15 minutes before that panel was to end. Thanks to Twitter, I was able to send out an alert using the Capclave hashtag that I wouldn’t be joining the panel, but still, I felt bad. I guess I learned my lesson—no more dinners at the Golden Bull on Friday nights!

My final panel that day was at 11:00 p.m.—”Why Do We Like Being Scared?” (And no, it’s not the latest panel I’ve ever done. Sometimes I’ve pontificated past midnight.) There was much talk of zombies. I also put out there that it might be my luck in having had a happy, untraumatized childhood which allows for me to be scared without being triggered. It’s a privilege I’ll have to consider in more depth later.

A little past midnight, I headed home. I rarely stay overnight at local cons such as Capclave and Balticon, preferring to pay for hotels only when the event isn’t drivable, even though that can lead to commutes of anywhere from 90 minutes to two hours. So I arrived home around two in the morning, and then by 10:30 a.m. Saturday, I was back on the road again … (more…)

While on the Belt Parkway in Brooklyn yesterday heading for a visit with Mirthful Marie Severin (about which more later), traffic came to a standstill. Not really a surprise on the Belt Parkway, but in this case, the reason was.

Up ahead, we could see a police car’s flashing lights, and on the other side of the vehicle, motorcyclists circling, with nothing but clear road beyond them. After 5-10 minutes of blockage, the motorcycles moved on, the police car shut its lights, and we were free to continue.

Then, one exit down the road, it happened all over again!

What was this about? I had no idea, but since since my wife was driving, I was free to search Twitter to see whether anyone had tweeted what was going on. I never did find out whether it was some strange police exercise, a biker protest, or perhaps even (yes, my mind went there) the scattering of a dead friend’s ashes.

After another 5-10 minutes, they took off, and we weren’t stopped again. (At least, not by that. After all, it is the Belt Parkway.) I never did find out had happened, but I did discover that the collected tweets about Belt Parkway paint a pretty noirish picture … one Irene classified as existential angst.

If you’ve never driven the Belt, this will give you some idea what it’s like. And if you have … well … these ought to bring back some pretty crappy memories.

I might as well just live on the belt parkway

— Peter Castellotti (@PeterPdoubleC) October 12, 2014

Belt parkway blows

— JUSTIN (@j_rhoadess) October 12, 2014

(more…)

I had a great time last weekend during my three days at Capclave, and I plan to tell you all about it after I upload the videos of the panels and two readings I recorded. But since bandwidth here is such that tossing those gigabytes up on YouTube will prevent me from doing a single other thing online for 24-48 hours, that probably won’t happen until the weekend is out. Meanwhile, you’ll have to be satisfied with a Capclave highlight that was Capclave without really being part of Capclave—

Pig face!

A couple of weeks back, Range—which I’ve been raving about here for quite awhile—added pig face to its menu. Only on Fridays and Saturdays, and only a few per night. Which meant, of course, I had to get there. Luckily, Capclave was coming.

Some of my friends were too queasy to look at a meal that looked back, but two who were as eager to dig into a pig face as I was were Mike and Beth Zipser, who you can see above, with the 18-hour sous vide pig face lovingly prepared by Chefs Mattie McGhee and Romeo Tivoli on a small platform between us.

We loved it, and quickly stripped it clean, as you can see from the before and after pics below. (For those who are into that sort of thing.) (more…)

Well, here it is, the second week of October, and I still have one final meal to tell you about from my London trip, a restaurant I visited all the way back during the second week of August. What’s up with that?

One reason is that the food at St. John Bread and Wine was just that good. The fact life threw so much at me during the past two months that I was delayed in getting to this shouldn’t prevent me from sharing the experience with you.

But the other reason to write this up even after all that time has passed is to once more praise the serendipitous power of Twitter.

Lisa Gemino, whom I’d somehow managed never to meet before even though we both have many years of parallel convention-going, reached out to me on Twitter (my foodie frenzy had caught her eye, I guess) to ask if I wanted to join her and her merry band of eaters for a trip to St. John, the Fergus Henderson restaurant known for its nose-to-tail menu. And I thought … why not?

It’s far too easy in our field to stick with the known, create cliques, insulate ourselves among our friends, and never make new ones. So I’ve often broken bread with total strangers at conventions. Though if we’ve both come to the same place out of our shared love of science fiction or fantasy or horror (depending on the con), are we really strangers?

So the Friday of Loncon3, nine of us headed to St. John Bread and Wine. Unfortunately, we couldn’t get to the originally planned St. John due to a mix-up—that entire restaurant was closed for a private party, and our reservation had been taken in error.

The dish I’d earlier seen on the menu that I was lusting after the most was ox cheek pie—a dish which was unfortunately being crossed out on the chalkboard just as our server reached us, because another party had moments before ordered the last one!

But don’t worry. What we had was amazing. (more…)

Wasn’t it just three days ago that I bemoaned the absence of any online video or photos from James Beard’s famous TV commercial for Heckers flour? Well, it might not have existed then, but it exists now.

That’s because Elizabeth Federici and Kathleen Squires have launched a Kickstarter campaign to raise funds for their documentary America’s First Foodie: The Incredible Life of James Beard, and their fundraising video includes footage from that ad, starting at :31 below.

You might ask, why is Beard holding a bag of Ceresota flour there, when the other day I showed you a screen grab of him holding a bag of Heckers flour? Turns out it’s a regional thing, and according the the Heckers/Ceresota FAQ—

Heckers Flour is sold in upstate New Jersey, New York and the New England states. Ceresota is sold in Illinois, Indiana, Iowa, lower New Jersey, greater Philadelphia and Wisconsin.

—so two different commercials must have been shot for the same company.

Whether Beard pitched for Ceresota or Heckers, what matters is—this is a worthy Kickstarter campaign. And for the next 28 days, you can donate here.

Back when I worked for Marvel Comics in the ’70s, the Dreaded Deadline Doom was (to steal a phrase Stan Lee often used in comics) wreaking havoc. Late writers and artists were resulting in thousands of dollars in penalty fees from the printer. And it was no fun for readers either, who wanted their comics on time. The only ones who benefited were beginning writers like me, who thanks to Marvel’s attempts to prevent those delays from messing up publishing schedules got to write fill-ins and back-ups.

That’s how I got to script issues of Master of Kung Fu and Omega the Unknown, as well as countless shorter stories, such as John Romita, Jr.’s first published piece.

But not every story I pitched or plotted made it to the page. Amazingly, there were a few, approved by editors, which were never turned in by the artists, creating their own Dreaded Deadline Doom. You wouldn’t think a new artist would blow a chance to get published by Marvel, but several did.

One pitch, however, meant for a fill-in issue of Marvel Team-Up, never made it to an artist, for it was presumably rejected. I have no memory of the circumstances, and only know that it was submitted on August 14, 1978 because that’s the date written on it.

As it’s the only Marvel method plot in existence for any of my published comics (none of my DC Comics full scripts survive either), I thought it worth sharing here to give some idea of how I worked back then, when I was 23 and still trying to figure out how to write comics. (And just in case it’s not obvious—the images below that I grabbed to break up the text here were not a part of my original proposal.)

And so …

Spider-Man’s Lonely Hearts Club Fans!

SPLASH: Spidey is swinging by the main branch of the New York City Post Office. His patrol is interrupted by a cry for help coming out of an upper window of the building.

THE STORY CONTINUES: Spidey-sense tingling, Spidey swings in the window. From inside we see a costumed goon with a futuristic gun on either side of the window. Spidey, still holding onto the webbing, does a split-kick, knocking each thug back off his feet. Spidey sees no sign of the person he’d heard cry for help just seconds before, and he thinks this odd. Spidey disarms the crooks with webbing and a tug. He grabs an empty mail sack and then, flipping over so that his feet are holding him to the ceiling directly above the two crooks’ heads. he grabs them by the scruff of their necks and stuffs them in the sack as they protest:

“Wait, Spider-Man, you don’t understand— ”

“I only understand that something wacky’s going on here!” says Spidey, as he holds the sack out the upper story window and begins questioning the crooks. Suddenly, from behind Spidey, a dry, cracked, withered, and shaking voice says:

“Stop that right now, y’hear, you young whippersnapper!” (more…)

Internet, you have disappointed me.

Wait … let me back that up a bit.

I’m not sure exactly when I fell in love with James Beard. Perhaps it was in the early ’70s while reading his wonderful American Cookery, in which he went off on a rant about how today’s chickens (well, the chickens of 40 years ago) just weren’t what they used to be—

Few have the delicate, delicious flavor of the old barnyard chicken, which may not have been raised so pristinely and plucked so cleanly but tasted of chicken and had excellent texture. … They come to the market uniform in size, uniform in color, and uniform in lack of real flavor. They require a good deal of seasoning to give them any character, and they fail to produce a rich broth.

I loved that curmudgeonliness! Beard’s commentary surrounding the recipes were (and continue to be) as interesting as the recipes themselves.

But that’s not what brings me here today. (more…)

I always knew, in a general way, that “If You Go Away” was based on Jacque Brel’s “Ne me quite pas,” but I had no idea what a pale shadow it was until I was sent down the YouTube rabbit hole by the season finale of The Leftovers, which featured Nina Simone’s brilliant take on the original. (Note that the clip below containing moments of the bloody aftermath of a suicide, so trigger warning.)

That led me to seek out a complete performance of Simone’s version … (more…)