{"id":15459,"date":"2014-08-04T21:37:39","date_gmt":"2014-08-05T01:37:39","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.scottedelman.com\/?p=15459"},"modified":"2014-08-04T21:37:39","modified_gmt":"2014-08-05T01:37:39","slug":"my-july-2014-dreams-joel-mchale-donald-trump-and-more","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.scottedelman.com\/wordpress\/2014\/08\/04\/my-july-2014-dreams-joel-mchale-donald-trump-and-more\/","title":{"rendered":"My July 2014 dreams: Joel McHale, Donald Trump, and more"},"content":{"rendered":"

If you’ve been following me for any length of time, then you already know the drill\u2014as each month ends, I gather the dreams I’d previously posted to Twitter<\/a> to see what sense their surreality makes when all in one place. <\/p>\n

And so … here’s what happened in July as I slept, starring Joel McHale, Donald Trump, Mariah Carey, Will Sasso, and many others.<\/p>\n

July 2014<\/strong><\/p>\n

I dreamt I was with my (long dead) grandmother, posing for a photo with her since none exist IRL. My awareness of her death dId not wake me. Jul 31<\/em><\/p>\n

I dreamt a friend told us he had cancer and was going deaf, “But the good news is — I’ll be dead before anyone realizes I can’t hear them.” Jul 31<\/em><\/p>\n

I dreamt I was at a con where I took a donut, sliced it in half and used a cookie to make a sandwich. WHY HAVE I NOT DONE THIS IN REAL LIFE? Jul 31<\/em><\/p>\n

I dreamt comic book artists I used to know in the ’70s showed up at Readercon, and when we chatted, the friendliest was Bernie Wrightson. Jul 30<\/em><\/p>\n

I dreamt I offered my parents individually wrapped Life Savers, and Dad (dead IRL) demurred, while Mom took a cherry and gave me a lemon. Jul 30<\/em><\/p>\n

I dreamt Jon Stewart and I were watching a member of The Daily Show<\/em> staff try out a new bit … and I was the only one who was laughing! Jul 29<\/em><\/p>\n

I dreamt I was fighting beside The Thing as part of a quartet — NOT the Fantastic Four — and he was shot in the neck. Bleeding, he fell. Jul 29<\/em><\/p>\n

I dreamt I wandered a Worldcon and spent more time paying attention to racking up @fitbit<\/a> steps than what was going on around me. Jul 28<\/em><\/p>\n

I dreamt I lived in a Boston brownstone, used a shotgun to scare a burglar, then waited for police since (I assumed) guns are illegal there. Jul 28<\/em><\/p>\n

I dreamt I interviewed a politician who’d edited a science fiction magazine when he was a kid. But he refused to answer questions about it. Jul 27<\/em><\/p>\n

I dreamt I was walking SDCC with @craigengler<\/a>, who asked about my coverage plans. I had to remind him we didn’t work at @blastr<\/a> anymore. Jul 27<\/em><\/p>\n

I dreamt I was trapped in a vast, old timey train station for some nefarious, never-revealed reason, the key dangling nearby to tease me. Jul 27<\/em><\/p>\n

I dreamt Anthony @Bourdain<\/a> gave me a food tour of a foreign country (unidentified in dream), after which I promised to send him recipes. Jul 26<\/em><\/p>\n

I dreamt that in order to catch a train I needed to run across a dozen active rail lines. I started, realized it was a stupid idea, stopped. Jul 26<\/em><\/p>\n

I dreamt @gerryconway<\/a> and I sat with stacks of memorabilia we saved from our @Marvel<\/a> days, comparing the memos we got from @therealstanlee<\/a>. Jul 26<\/em><\/p>\n

I dreamt I said something I’d NEVER say in life: “It’s not a question of what stories you want to tell, it’s what audiences want to hear.” Jul 25<\/em><\/p>\n

I dreamt I was using heavy machinery to move massive amounts of earth to create a berm around a museum to protect it … from what? Jul 25<\/em><\/p>\n

I dreamt I was advising students entering a drama competition, who at the last minute decided to write new lyrics to ALL of Rocky Horror<\/em>. Jul 25<\/em><\/p>\n

I dreamt I was at a SDCC panel where if you wanted to ask a question, you had to climb forward Roberto Benigni-like on the backs of chairs. Jul 25<\/em><\/p>\n

I dreamt Donald Trump dropped by, went through my bookcases, and tried to steal my old fanzines, claiming they were his. And so we fought! Jul 24<\/em><\/p>\n

I dreamt a romcom — lifelong bachelor always standing women up at the altar finally falls in love and is himself stood up, learns lesson. Jul 24<\/em><\/p>\n

I dreamt I was at a newsstand reading an imaginary issue of MAD<\/em> which included a piece on how movies would’ve been changed by adding Conan. Jul 21<\/em><\/p>\n

I dreamt @leslie_what<\/a> brought a shotgun to Worldcon and gave us a chance to take target practice on a life-sized Where’s Waldo<\/em> mannequin. Jul 21<\/em><\/p>\n

I dreamt I was at a Barbra Streisand concert — one of the last places you’d ever find me — talking to Mariah Carey about Irving Berlin. Jul 19<\/em><\/p>\n

I dreamt I wandered the Brooklyn Museum with @WillSasso<\/a>, explaining how impressive the Egyptology artifacts were when I saw them as a kid. Jul 15<\/em><\/p>\n

I dreamt I was asked my wish, and I said, “I want people to be as happy as they can possibly be without that happiness making others sad.” Jul 13<\/em><\/p>\n

I dreamt Joel McHale accidentally shot himself while on Late Show With David Letterman<\/em> … but at first, people thought it was just a gag. Jul 9<\/em><\/p>\n

I dreamt I was at Disney World with my George Formby Society pal Johnny Foodstamp. I’d brought my banjo uke along and he was giving me tips! Jul 9<\/p>\n

I dreamt I tried to record a hilarious reading at Worldcon with my Flip camcorder, but sadly, whatever buttons I pushed, nothing happened. Jul 8<\/em><\/p>\n

I dreamt I was editing a massive book on Lincoln and going over thousands of pages to be fact-checked with the editor — Christine Baranski. Jul 8<\/em><\/p>\n

I dreamt it was opening day of my new restaurant, and I was scurrying this way and that seating guests, and readying for a welcome toast. Jul 8<\/em><\/p>\n

I dreamt I suddenly tired of my Duck Dynasty<\/em>-style beard, so began ripping out in hunks. I refused to leave the house until I could shave. Jul 6<\/em><\/p>\n

I dreamt we were at a party when a ceiling fan stopped working, so my wife pulled it down and fixed it. She’s even competent in dreams! Jul 6<\/em><\/p>\n

I dreamt someone created a chat room where we could complain about science fiction anonymously. I logged in, but — I could see every name! Jul 6<\/em><\/p>\n

I dreamt I was in a South American restaurant easily ordering the guinea pig but unable to convey I didn’t want coffee-flavored ice cream. Jul 5<\/em><\/p>\n

I dreamt I was in a con suite somewhere debating the usefulness of SFWA. I don’t remember who was there, only that I spoke in its favor. Jul 5<\/em><\/p>\n

I dreamt @mrbelm<\/a> and I were in the backyard setting fruits and vegetables on fire and hurling them. We had trouble lighting pickles, though. Jul 5<\/em><\/p>\n

I dreamt I visited a theme park where rides were based on @TorBooks<\/a> stories. Had trouble deciphering which novel inspired each ride, though. Jul 4<\/em><\/p>\n

I dreamt a guy was able to control zombies by using his 10 detachable fingers … until a German Shepherd began eating them one by one! Jul 3<\/em><\/p>\n

I dreamt that while on Amtrak to NYC I sat next to a woman heading there to appear in Music Man<\/em>. I slowly realized — she was animatronic! Jul 3<\/em><\/p>\n

I dreamt I was on a call with Paul Di Filippo and Gil Roth, about to share my 10 most and least favorite books. This made Gil was nervous. Jul 3<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

If you’ve been following me for any length of time, then you already know the drill\u2014as each month ends, I gather the dreams I’d previously posted to Twitter to see what sense their surreality makes when all in one place. And so … here’s what happened in July as I slept, starring Joel McHale, Donald […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[12],"class_list":["post-15459","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-dreams"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.scottedelman.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15459","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.scottedelman.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.scottedelman.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.scottedelman.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.scottedelman.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=15459"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/www.scottedelman.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15459\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":15470,"href":"https:\/\/www.scottedelman.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15459\/revisions\/15470"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.scottedelman.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=15459"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.scottedelman.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=15459"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.scottedelman.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=15459"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}