Apparently, the Internet trolls have their knives out for John Scalzi tonight. (But is there ever a night during which the Internet trolls don’t have their knives out for John Scalzi?)

After he posted a dashing photo of himself wearing Rachel Caine‘s red shoes at the Romantic Times Booklovers Convention, “The sexist dipshits are passing around the picture of me in high heels, as if I did something shameful. Because they are sexist dipshits.”

So to give those sexist dipshits a distraction that might take some heat off John, and to show I’ve always been willing to do pretty much anything and not care what anyone else might think, may I present—

Me as a high school junior. Wearing a tutu. And a black-and-white sequined bra. A black-and-white sequined bra that needed to be heavily stuffed with tissues.

You’re welcome.

I have an extremely active dream life, and those that I remember I share each morning on Twitter. Once a month, I harvest them from the rest of my tweets and share them here. So below is what went through my sleeping mind during April.

My guest stars included Elaine Stritch, Jamie Foxx, John Barrowman, Woody Allen, Ray Bradbury, Paul Newman, Mad Men’s Roger Sterling, and more.

Step into last month’s subconscious …

APRIL 2013



I dreamt that as I headed to an opera house, I saw ‪@doctorow rushing the other way, having forgotten his ticket. We agreed to speak later. 30 Apr

I dreamt I was part of a drug deal gone bad, but somehow was able to get away and hide in an alley until it all blew over. 28 Apr

I dreamt I was with ‪@mrbelm at a party run by the people behind that world’s 50 best restaurants list, but couldn’t get to any of the food! 28 Apr

I dreamt I was carrying my father’s coffin from the hearse to the gravesite, and one of the pallbearers was Mad Men’s Roger Sterling.

 28 Apr

I dreamt I was on a courtesy computer in a hotel lobby with ‪@amelia_beamer, searching fruitlessly for an article I’d hoped to show her.

 27 Apr

I dreamt I attended Xavier’s School for Gifted Mutants, and all around me, kids pranked each other. I never found out my own power though.

 26 Apr

I dreamt that after my waitress brought my entree, I noticed she was — Elaine Stritch! So I jumped up and hugged her and wouldn’t let go.

 25 Apr

I dreamt a man with a razor tried to mug me on a deserted nighttime street, but I kept spinning out of his reach and eventually got away.

 25 Apr

I dreamt I was given a tour of an extremely odd museum, about which I remember little, save for the surreal room of deflated balloons.

 25 Apr

I dreamt I spotted a kidnapper with his child victim in a bus station. When he seemed distracted, I tackled him and held until police came.

 24 Apr

(more…)

My short story “Things That Never Happened” will soon appear in Postscripts #30/31 from PS Publishing. The issue, which carries not just a number, but also the title Memoryville Blues, will be out once the signature sheets pass through the hands of all the contributors and make their way back to the publisher.

I’m not sure how long that whole process will take, but while we wait, check out the cover below (which might not be the final design).

Here’s the complete Table of Contents:

(more…)

The 2013 list of the World’s 50 Best Restaurants has just been released, and I’ve been to four of them. I hope to hit a couple more real soon—especially The Fat Duck, which is a 2014 goal of mine either before or after the London Worldcon.

Click through on restaurants 5, 9, 14, and 15 to see what I thought of them … and prepare to salivate.

1. El Celler de Can Roca,Girona, Catalonia, Spain.
2. Noma, Copenhagen
4. Mugaritz, San Sebastián, Spain
5. Eleven Madison Park, New York City
6. D.O.M., Sao Paulo, Brazil
7. Dinner by Heston Blumenthal, London
8. Arzak, San Sebastián, Spain
9. Steirereck Restaurant, Vienna, Austria
10. Vendôme, Bergisch Gladbach, Germany
11. Per Se, New York City, USA
12. Frantzén/Lindeberg, Stockholm, Sweden
13. The Ledbury, London, UK
14. Astrid y Gastón, Lima, Peru
15. Alinea, Chicago, USA
16. L’Arpège, Paris, France
17. Pujol, Mexico City, Mexico
18. Le Chateaubriand, Paris, France
19. Le Bernardin, New York City, USA
20. Narisawa, Tokyo, Japan
21. Attica, Melbourne, Australia
22. Nihonryori RyuGin, Tokyo, Japan
23. L’Astrance, Paris, France
24. L’Atelier Saint-Germain de Joël Robuchon, Paris, France
25. Hof Van Cleve, Kruishoutem, Belgium
26. Quique Dacosta, Dénia, Spain
27. Le Calandre, Rubano, Italy
28. Mirazur, Menton, France
29. Daniel, New York City, USA
30. Aqua, Wolfsburg, Germany
31. Biko, Mexico City, Mexico
32. Nahm, Bangkok, Thailand
33. The Fat Duck, Bray, UK
34. Fäviken, Järpen, Sweden
35. Oud Sluis, Sluis, Netherlands
36. Amber, Hong Kong, China
37. Vila Joya, Albufeira, Portugal
38. Restaurant Andre, Singapore
39. 8 1/2 Otto E Mezzo Bombana, Hong Kong, China
40. Combal.Zero, Rivoli, Italy
41. Piazza Duomo, Alba, Italia
42. Schloss Schauenstein, Fürstenau, Switzerland
43. Mr & Mrs Bund, Shanghai, China
44. Asador Etxebarri, Atxondo, Spain
45. Geranium, Copenhagen, Denmark
46. Mani, São Paulo, Brasil
47. The French Laundry, Yountville, USA
48. Quay, Sydney, Australia
49. Septime, Paris, France
50. Central, Lima, Perú

Eleven Madison Park’s jump from #10 to #5 makes me think I’ve got to head back for another try, as my underwhelmed reaction continues to trouble me. But next time, it’ll be dinner instead of lunch.

So—how many have YOU managed to hit?

The chameleon-like Next restaurant releases an enigmatic video with each new cuisine it serves (check out The Hunt and Kyoto, for example), so those of us who love the place wonder what we’ll see in support of the new Vegan menu, which begins May 8.

Over on Twitter, Christian Seel just shared a screen grab from that coming video, which has me wondering …

… what does that image have to do with a Vegan cuisine?

My guess? Actor Stephen Bernacki is about to strip off his work clothes, toss away that briefcase, abandon the urban lifestyle, and go back to the land.

Can’t wait to see whether I’m right. And, as usual, can’t wait to get back to Next!

Next Saturday is Free Comic Book Day, which means that if you wander into a comics shop on May 4, 2013, you might just walk out with a comic book written … by me!

But how is that possible? I haven’t written any comics in decades. How could I possibly have anything in a comic handed out on Free Comic Book Day?

Blame Thanos!

Bill Hall of The Daily Kirby let me know today (beating out Marvel Comics, who’s yet to alert me) that my back-up story from Logan’s Run #6, which starred Thanos and Drax the Destroyer, will be reprinted in Infinity, Marvel’s giveaway for Free Comic Book Day. All because Thanos is now a big deal due to his appearance at the end of The Avengers movie.

The freebie is described as follows: (more…)

If you know anything about me, you know I like to make every meal count. So when I head off to a convention, I do my research. And with LoneStarCon 3 right around the corner (hey, when you’re making strategic plans like these, what can I say, August does seem just around the corner), I’ve already scouted out where I want to eat in San Antonio.

First on my hit list—did you know that the Culinary Institute of America, training ground for so many fine chefs, has a branch in San Antonio? And that they operate a restaurant? I had no idea, but it’s called Nao, and I aim to eat there either the Friday or Saturday night of the convention.

That’s their causitas made with purple potato puree and crab above, which I look forward to seeing on a plate in front of me in a few months.

Next up, Bliss, where chef Mark Bliss, considered a San Antonio legend, does his stuff.

(more…)

The Boston manhunt is over, and my thoughts continue to be with the victims of the initial blasts, as well as the shootings which followed. I have little to contribute save my sadness. But this tragedy, thanks to social media, does bring to mind another tragedy from exactly 18 years ago …

Assuming we’re not being hoaxed, Dzhokhar A. Tsarnaev, aka suspect #2, had a Twitter account. If real, I’m sure pundits will analyze it the hopes of finding a reason why Tsarnaev took the path he did. I don’t believe they’ll find one there. But what stood out to me (for reasons which will shortly become clear) is that he watched Breaking Bad …

… as well as The Walking Dead …

(more…)

I told you Friday about Image Duplicator, an upcoming gallery show in which comic book artists are going back to the sources Roy Lichtenstein used without credit in his paintings and doing new pieces based on the primary images in order to comment on the controversy surrounding the lack of attribution.

I spotted another artistic response today that tickled me.

First, take a look at Roy Lichtenstein’s “I Can See the Whole Room … and There’s Nobody in It!”

That painting, based on a panel by William Overgard from a Steve Roper newspaper strip, sold for $43.2 million November 2011. $43.2 million!

Here’s Overgard’s original image. (more…)

If you’ve been hanging around here for any length of time, you already know how much I despise Roy Lichtenstein and those who I feel treat comic book artists the same way he did. So I was delighted to learn via Bleeding Cool that UK comic book artists were planning to protest the Lichtenstein exhibition at the Tate Modern with an exhibition of their own.

Image Duplicator is the name of a show which will appear at the Orbital Gallery in Leicester Square from May 16th-31st, gathering together the works of artists commenting on Lichtenstein’s treatment of the original creators he never credited.

Here’s what they’ve been invited to do:

Every interested comic artist (or illustrator, graphic designer or other “commercial artist”) should “re-reappropriate” one of the comic images Lichtenstein used, and rework it, using some of their ‘commercial art’ drawing skills, to warp and twist it into something interesting and original, and in the process to comment on this type of appropriation.

The first response I spotted was by Dave Gibbons, who tackled one of Lichtenstein’s most famous copyings. First, here’s the Lichtenstein, titled “Whaam!”

Before taking a look at what Gibbons did, check out Irv Novick’s original panel from All-American Men of War #89 (Jan.-Feb. 1962).
(more…)