I picked up a free copy of the Bethel Bulletin at a truckstop during our New Jersey trip last weekend, and as I read the newspaper aloud to Irene while we continued our drive, its quirky headlines and leads kept cracking us up.

I enjoyed its plainspoken prose. These editors don’t hold back in the slightest from letting you know exactly how they feel.

Here are a few examples:

PUNKS PILFER PURSE FROM VEHICLE
Goons swiped a purse that was under the driver’s seat of a vehicle that was unlocked in the parking lot of …

LOWLIFES DENT VEHICLE DOOR
Goons dented the driver’s side door on a vehicle on …

KNUCKLEHEADS STEAL DIRT BIKE
Losers stole a dirt bike that was for sale …

The mix of lowlifes, goons, knuckleheads and punks kept us laughing, but the best headline added a pun to the mix, as follows:

Kudos to the editors of the Bethel Bulletin for putting their cards on the table and helping us to pass the time on a long trip!